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Author Topic: Any Epileptics on here  (Read 581 times)
Ural Quntz
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« on: January 14, 2019, 06:35:20 PM »

If so stop reading this post....

I was in the pub last night telling my mate the joke about the epileptic in the bath and if he started having a fit, you know the one.. You'd throw the washing in....... However, a bloke sat at the table next to us turned round and said, "My brother was an epileptic and he had a fit while in the bath and died!"
Well fuck me, I just wanted the ground to open up and swallow me whole..... I said, "I'm really sorry to hear that mate, I didn't mean any offence, did he drown?"
He said, "No, he choked on a sock."


 :basil: :basil:
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Johnny Thunder
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« Reply #1 on: January 14, 2019, 06:45:45 PM »

 
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PoliteDwarf
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« Reply #2 on: January 14, 2019, 06:56:38 PM »

 :basil:
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mingebag
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« Reply #3 on: January 16, 2019, 01:07:21 PM »

Them "3 for a pound" ones were a nightmare 

 jc True story
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LEON TROTSKY
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I GOT AN ICE PICK... THAT MADE MY EARS BURN...


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« Reply #4 on: January 16, 2019, 01:09:13 PM »

MY AUNTIE JOAN WAS YOU CUNT  oleary

DIED LAST APRIL  :unlike:
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Keef69er
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« Reply #5 on: January 16, 2019, 01:59:15 PM »

I remember my mate was telling a joke about the nazis and this oldish lad goes "dont mean to be someone who gets offended but my grandad died in a concentration camp" it all went silent and my mate was obv wanting the earth to swallow him..then the lad goes "poor cunt fell out of one of the gun towers"  :mido:
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Ural Quntz
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« Reply #6 on: January 16, 2019, 02:10:22 PM »

 
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mingebag
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« Reply #7 on: January 16, 2019, 02:11:45 PM »

MY AUNTIE JOAN WAS YOU CUNT  oleary

DIED LAST APRIL  :unlike:

Did you get the sock back  :pd:
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Ural Quntz
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« Reply #8 on: January 16, 2019, 02:13:51 PM »

MY AUNTIE JOAN WAS YOU CUNT  oleary

DIED LAST APRIL  :unlike:

Did you get the sock back  :pd:

You're bad...... :alf:
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V6
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« Reply #9 on: January 16, 2019, 02:14:18 PM »

a old female friend of mine actually died in the bath through elipesy fortunatly she was in early days of a relationship and as her BF hadnt received the normal morning text he texted her mother who then went round to her house and found her in the bath.  souey souey
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TerryCochranesSocks
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Pull your socks up Tel.


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« Reply #10 on: January 16, 2019, 02:15:15 PM »

Anti-static laundry balls.

 klins
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mingebag
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« Reply #11 on: January 16, 2019, 02:21:16 PM »

Judging by this thread showers are the way forward  :tp1:
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LEON TROTSKY
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I GOT AN ICE PICK... THAT MADE MY EARS BURN...


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« Reply #12 on: January 16, 2019, 02:52:08 PM »

MY AUNTIE JOAN WAS YOU CUNT  oleary

DIED LAST APRIL  :unlike:

Did you get the sock back  :pd:

YOU WILL GET A SOCK SOON YA CUNT WITH A COUPLE OF POOL BALLS IN IT  :wanker:
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mingebag
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« Reply #13 on: January 16, 2019, 03:01:04 PM »

MY AUNTIE JOAN WAS YOU CUNT  oleary

DIED LAST APRIL  :unlike:

Did you get the sock back  :pd:

YOU WILL GET A SOCK SOON YA CUNT WITH A COUPLE OF POOL BALLS IN IT  :wanker:
mick is it the same sock  :pd:
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Korky
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« Reply #14 on: January 16, 2019, 07:54:03 PM »

Just put my footy bets on for the weekend. I had to use the money I was supposed to by my wifes epilepsy drugs with. She'll have a fucking fit if she finds out. 
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Robbso
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« Reply #15 on: January 16, 2019, 07:55:54 PM »

Cash out
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CLEM FANDANGO
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« Reply #16 on: January 16, 2019, 09:17:14 PM »

What do you call an epileptic in a deck chair?

A Transformer.

 
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monkeyman
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« Reply #17 on: January 16, 2019, 09:19:11 PM »

WHAT DO YER CALL A EPILEPTIC COWBOY
TEX FITS  :tp1:
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